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I want to lose myself.

Discontent is a very interesting feeling. I think we try so hard to get more of what we want that we lose sight of what's best for us and what will make us happiest in the long run.

My current struggle is with work. I have a great job, I am blessed really, but the stuff I am working on these days is entirely uninteresting to me. I see no improvement that I'm actually providing to the world. I don't see how we're going to keep paying for pharmaceutical "improvements" when the majority of the people on the planet can't afford it. It seems as if the health care industry is upside down as the rich take from the sick and their families.

I want to do something that's going to help the majority of people. I want to love comfortably, but more than that I want to live freely, and live to help the world. I don't want to leave a legacy of self interest or self importance. For all I'm concerned, my "self", as I know it, is simply the physical form my consciousness is stuck with. My body isn't me anymore than the food I eat is. I don't want my legacy to be about what I attained, I want it to be about what I was able to give away, or better yet, help others achieve.

I want to help my fellow man. I don't know if I'm doing that the most I could right now with my life and that's pretty frustrating. I really need to start volunteering more of my time. Or maybe just doing more with my time. I would love to be able to start a non-profit and just do something innovative, improving the lives of others.

Here's to love, we can always use more of it.


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